


You ever wonder what it's like to drink monster energy mixed with black coffee

by orphan_account



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses, Mother 3, Persona 5
Genre: Alternate Universe - Boarding School, Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - No Powers, Coffee Dad Sakura Sojiro, Crack, Everything is Beautiful and Nothing Hurts, F/F, F/M, I Don't Even Know, I Tried, I'm Sorry, M/M, Social Media, There will be gay, Yup you read that right, caspar von bergliez is incapable of shutting the fuck up, i dont even know how often this will be updated, i need more gremlin lucas, lots of crack, lots of gay, lucas is a gremlin, prepare for stupidity, technically smash bros but it's m3/p5/fe3h centric, the mother 3/persona 5/fire emblem three houses crossover nobody asked for, why isnt that a tag
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-10
Updated: 2020-10-10
Packaged: 2021-03-07 18:41:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 896
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26932306
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: ii don't even knowanyway this is a bunch of social media posts of the wonderful experiences of the students attending SSB Academy and SSB University, based off of the wonderful hellsite known as tumblrdont ask me why i have an entire pinterest board dedicated to stupid tumblr postssome prose will be added in if i feel like it hmmgfn
Relationships: Akechi Goro/Persona 5 Protagonist, Claus & Lucas (Mother 3), DImitri Alexandre Blaiddyd/Male My Unit | Byleth - Relationship, Edelgard von Hresvelg/Female My Unit | Byleth - Relationship, there's more but i'm lazy - Relationship
Kudos: 7





	You ever wonder what it's like to drink monster energy mixed with black coffee

**Post made by Sunfwowew_owo**

ok so i may or may not have made an entirely new account just for the stupid shit i hear during high school

SSBA is WILD

like i cant??? believe??? that this is one of the most prestigious boarding schools out there like

i shit you not i legit heard someone whisper really loudly,

"Anyone know what a horse penis looks like"

while we were doing independent textbook reading

**Reply made by Cawwot_uwu**

what class was this? animal science? biology?

**Reply made by Sunfwowew_owo**

this was global history

* * *

**Post made by Cawwot_uwu**

so i may or may not have made an ai to to generate candy heart messages while i was bored during literature class

candy-hearts.img

tag yourself im cool cud

**Reply made by inkwing_ewe**

hole

**Reply made by Sunfwowew_owo**

u hack

**Reply made by Im_not_a_cat**

bog love

**Reply made by tested_professor**

am good

**Reply made by proven_professor**

fang

* * *

**Post made by tested_professor**

one of my students legit called a chili pepper a "hoohooha" i am done with this school

edit: oh my god another student called it a "hahahoo" i hate period 6 for a reason

edit #2: went to tesco to see that they fucking changed the chili pepper labels to "hoohooha" and "hahahoo" i dont want to live on this planet anymore

* * *

**Post made by inkwing_ewe**

so i was having a nice bonding moment with my dad

and i typed "ohana means family"

guess what autofucker changed it to

"obama means gmail"

* * *

**Post made by Pancake_Prince**

does killing your twin in the womb count as a sociopathic tendency this is a very important and time-sensitive question help

**Reply made by inkwing_ewe**

uuuuhhh i think so???

**Reply made by Fuel_to_the_fire**

op why do you need to know this

**Reply made by For_real**

op?? helo??

* * *

**Post made by aaaaaaaaaa**

imagine what english would be like if banana had any other vowel

benene

binini

bonono

bununu

bynyny

**Reply made by tested_professor**

what was the original purpose for this hellsite because i think something went wrong along the way

* * *

**Post made by Im_not_a_cat**

so im like 15 mins early to book club right

and im like chilling on my laptop doing the things i normally do before class

this really cute guy just walks in, flops down next to me, screams "I'm going to die", dumps a bunch of monster energy into his coffee, and downs the entire thing in one go

edit: book club convo derailed into who has the most sociopathic tendencies and the same guy literally said "i killed my twin while in the womb"

i think i'm in love

edit #2: yep im in love

edit #3: to all y'all telling me to ask him out, idk his name

edit #4: got his phone number and name, not listing them for privacy reasons, we're friends now

edit #5: his roommate accidentally put red bull into the coffee machine instead of water and now apparently he can smell colors

edit #6: WE WERE HANGING OUT AFTER SCHOOL AND HE WAS COMPLAINING ABOUT HW SO I GAVE HIM A HEADPAT ON ACCIDENT AND HE FREAKED OUT WHAT DO I DO

edit #7: HE'S AVOIDING ME SHIT SHIT SHIT I FUCKED UP

edit #8: HE FINALLY CONFRONTED ME TODAY AND I LET HIM PET MY CAT AS AN APOLOGY FOR THE HEADPAT AJGDSHFLKDSJGSDLFJSD AND HE FUCKING SMILED AAAAAAAAAAA HE'S SO CUUUTTEEE

edit #9: I HAD A DUMBASS BI PANIK MOMENT TM AND ASKED HIM OUT OVER TEXT FUCCKK

edit #10: WE'RE GOING TO A CAFE ON SUNDAY

* * *

**Post made by Pancake_Prince**

oh my god oh my god oh my god

so

there's this guy in book club

really chill dude

we met when i dumped a monster energy drink into my coffee and drank it but we don't talk about that

anyway we became friends and uh

he be cute tho???

and he's also like legitimately trustworthy?

we haven't known each other for the longest time (about 3 months) but i find myself just letting loose around him and it's really cathartic???

anyway uh we were hanging out after school one day and i almost had a stress-induced meltdown

and he 

he fucking gave me a headpat???

yeah i definitely have a crush

anyway i panicked because like what are you supposed to do when a cute guy gives you a headpat after you've been touch-starved the majority of your life

and i think that gave him the wrong impression because he looked really hurt and fuck i just made things so awkward between us fuuuuccckkk

edit: he looks really sad now and i have no idea what to do

edit #2: to the people telling me to talk to him: i cannot socialize to save my life fuck hnnnn what is social interaction

edit #3: just realized how attached i was to him and ghgh fuck what do i doooo

edit #3: finally confronted him today and he let me pet his cat and gahldghasdf he looked so happy just agh my heart

edit #4: holy sHI T HE ASKED ME OUT UH PANIC PANIC

edit #5: I ACCEPTED WE'RE GOING OUT ON SUNDAY HOLY FUCK

* * *

**Post made by Cawwot_uwu**

calling out _@Pancake_Prince_ for spamming my pms at 1 in the fucking AM over some guy he met at book club

**Reply made by Pancake_Prince**

oh ok fuck you too

**Author's Note:**

> if you wanna see the candy hearts thing, here's a link: https://www.pinterest.com/pin/131659989094789279/?nic_v2=1a5hvSoBB
> 
> wow this really derailed huh


End file.
